MANIPULATION

One of the most important things that can be done for a manipulative individual is to assist him to gain a healthier sense of self esteem and to learn how to constructively cope with the activities of daily living.


Manipulation is a set of behaviors whose goal is to:

• Get you what you want from others even when the others are not willing initially to give it to you.

• Make it seem to others that they have come up with an idea or offer of help on their own when in reality you have worked on them to promote this idea or need for help for your own benefit.

• Dishonestly get people to do or act in a way which they might not have freely chosen on their own.

• "Con'' people to believe what you want them to believe as true.

• Get "your way'' in almost every interaction you have with people, places, or things.

• Present reality the way you want others to see it rather than the way it "really is.''

• Hide behind a "mask'' and let people see you in an acceptable way when in reality you are actually feeling or acting in an ``unacceptable'' way for these people.

• Maintain control and power over others even though they think they have the control and power.

• Make other people feel sorry for you even though it would be better for them to make you accept your personal responsibility for your own actions.

• Get away with not having to do the things necessary to meet your obligations, responsibilities, and duties in life.

• Involve everyone in your life's problems so that you do not have to face the problems alone.

• Keep everything the same so that the "status quo'' is not affected or changed.

• Make others feel guilty or responsible for actions or thoughts which are yours alone.

• Get others to feel like they are responsible for your welfare so that you do not have to make a decision or take responsibility for anything that goes wrong in your life.